a different perspective

I was SO dreading Halloween.

Halloween was MY holiday. My favorite HOLIDAY. I mean for pete's sake, I established Falloween for the past TEN YEARS to garner excitement for the day. I was the one who made elaborate treats, elaborate costumes, elaborate "excitement" for everyone involved. Even BEFORE I had kids.

So I was hurt this year. Hurt that the costume I had planned for my kids, and actually made for Kaya, was vetoed.

They are with dad this year. The ultra-sticker stabber of divorce. It made me sad. The kids told me that dad already ordered their costumes so my plans were out the window---because it was "dad's day". I wanted to say something, but kept my mouth closed.

I swallowed my pride and went to his house for "trick-or-treat".

BUT...

it was kind of nice being the "visiting" parent and not have to deal with the costume malfunctions.

it was kind of nice being the "visiting" mom.....which made them so excited to see me.

it was kind of nice being the "visiting" parent...who had tons of fun with them getting candy but not the one that had to get them to bed after they had all of that candy.

it was kind of nice visiting with all of my "old" neighbors and enjoying them....without worrying about what my kids were doing.

Yes, it's hard. It's hard not having my kids each night......but I'm going to count my blessings tonight for all the GOOD THINGS that happened.

It is a different way of life, a different perspective....but it is all good....thanks to all of you.

all you need is love

Today, I was filled with guilt......as a single mom, I'm trying to make an income. I'm working my book business as much as I can to make a comfortable living for myself and my children. But it is tough.....I still ask my parents, who are the greatest blessing, for help and I still am blessed by friends and the kindness of strangers to get what I need. ONE. DAY. AT. A. TIME.

This morning I got up at 5:00 even though I didn't "have to get up" until about 7:30. I got up to exercise, pray, and have some time to myself. While I'm praying I didn't have the "best" attitude. I'm angry with how life is going.....I want things to get resolved....I want things to go my way. But I read some scripture: Matthew 26:36-39. At first I didn't want to read it because I thought "God, REALLY I have to read Mattthew.......kind of ironic...but my DivorceCare passage said do it." But in that is the passage where Jesus prays before he is crucified and he says " My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will."

I'm not trying to say my "CUP" is a fraction of big of what Jesus was going through at that time....but that scripure hit me. I WANT my kids.....I miss them.....It HURTS...it kills my heart. Some may think I'm a wimp because I do see them at least a few times a week and sometimes 5 days at a time. But I am used to seeing them EVERY DAY......for most of their life. Splitting custody and only seeing them for days at a time instead of each day BREAKS my heart.

So today was my day to get them.......I was so excited. But also overwhelmed with guilt. I have a bookfair going on that I am working ( to make that money I was talking about) and the bookfair open-houses are tonight and tomorrow night......when I have my kids. I was so torn between working and spending time with my kids that my heart was aching.

BUT I had to take them with me. I knew they could behave. I took lots of stuff for them to do to occupy themselves. I even told them they could "work" for a book by passing out bookmarks and stickers. BUT I felt guilty.

BUT the bookfair experience went beautifully for my kids. THEY LOVED IT! When we left, Kaya said "Mom, I love going to work with you....can we do it again?" Zander said, "Mom, I just love Wednesdays when I get to spend time with you and I love working bookfairs.....you are the nicest and most fun mom ever."

Guess my "cup" is getting taken care of.

Then we get home. It is so cold here in Atlanta.....30 degree weather in October!! And I figure out my furnace burners and heat does not work now.......and it is too late for anyone to come fix it!! So, I tell the kids.....you know what, lets all sleep together in mom's bed.....with lots of quilts. (I'm typing this now in my sweatsuit, robe, and snuggly socks because it is SO COLD in our house....a brisk 50 degrees). I also read to them the "Little House in The Big Woods" by Laura Ingalls Wilder, about when they had such a cold winter that they all had to bundle together under quilts to keep warm. I told them that was what we were doing tonight. Zander just giggled and said, "Oh Mom, this is the BEST night of my life. I LOVE spending time with you...no matter the problem, we figure it out." Oh he thinks we are living the "old-timey" life but I am warming all the quilts in the dryer......thank goodness we have electricity!!

SWEET BOY. I am BLESSED. I was so worried about being a working single-mom---and worried they would gripe about the heat.......BUT my sweet kids showed me my "cup" is being taken care of and all we need is LOVE.

snow day

Last week when areas of the country that rarely have snow got covered, we actually got some of the white stuff. I was pretty sure this would be all we would see so I let the kids run out and enjoy it while playing dress-up. Now I notice what a crazy mother I am since they are not wearing coats......we were caught up in the moment of catching snowflakes. But after a snuggly nap and watching the movie, SnowBuddies, we saw some thick snow!

Thick enough for a snowangel!
Fluffy enough to slide down the hill in...
Enough accumulation to make a snowman!
And Zan's favorite.....plenty for a snowball fight!
We enjoyed our Winter Wonderland. I'm sure we enjoyed it because we haven't been stuck in it all Winter. It was a beautiful sight!

an adorable tea party

One of my favorite girls in the world, my "niece" Katie, turned 8 this week. I cannot believe it!! I'm glad I got the honor of attending her very special tea party this weekend.

Here are the girls before the party with their dolls.

Being the very sweet and helpful girl she always is....Katie helps the little ones with their jewelry.


Isn't this party a dream come true.......fancy, fancy, fancy!!!

Sue was so creative in her party planning for her little girl. Look at these flowerpots....They are filled with ice cream and oreos (dirt) topped with an artificial rose!
The extremely cute invites and menus....

And the cupcakes. The "roses" are actually fruit roll-ups---I will be stealing some of these ideas when Kaya gets a little older.
Sue also had a wonderful craft table for the girls to go to when they first arrived. Here she is helping one of the guests make a fan for herself and a mini-fan for her doll.
They also decorated tea-cups with paint pens.
And all of the girls looked so fanciful and adorable all dressed up!




When I asked Kaya what her favorite part of the party was she said, "My favorite part was when Katie opened her gift from me and was so happy."

As a mom, that made my heart smile. Sometimes she can show me that she has the kindest soul.

My favorite part was getting hugs from the "little" girls when they got tired and cranky and really had no use for partying anymore!
Camden ran across the room to hug me. I'm not sure if Kaya was up to sharing her mommy though---as you can see---
They finally decided to settle down again and be best friends. Amazingly these two highly energetic girls let me hold them and rock them for almost an hour while Katie and the big girls unwrapped gifts and acted silly. We just sat in the background and watched.





It was a perfect party with perfect friends! Happy Birthday Katie Rose!!! Love, Aunt Korisa

girly weekend

morning treats

coloring with my kiddos

blueberry coffee

cute braids

I am thankful for "dishes"

Chores. Really, who enjoys them? I am not the greatest housekeeper in the world but I try to keep it together as much as I can.

But a few months ago, being the stay-at-home mom and primary housekeeper, the lack of respect from my kids for all the chores was driving me crazy. I would work like crazy and they would follow along and work like crazy to mess it all up!

So the introduction of the chore chart began. Each day the kids were responsible for 3 chores. We did this faithfully for about 3 weeks then with the craziness of life I forgot to keep it up!

But they still do chores (I guess the "chore-system" worked after all). Now all I have to say is, "Go make up your bed." "Go pick up your toys so mom can vacuum." And they do it......most of the time.

But the new chore they love the most is helping me wash dishes. Which is ironic, because that is the chore I despise the most. I HATE washing dishes. And I HATE putting dishes away. If I could hire a little fairy to do those jobs every day, I would be in heaven.

I remember when I was 11 or 12, that chore became part of my daily life. I HATED it! I remember telling my mom once, "You only had me so I would wash your dishes. I will NEVER make my kids wash dishes."

I still don't like to do it. I will cook a feast for an army but I hate the clean-up. A couple of my friends that come over for playdates or parties always do the dishes for me (and I love them dearly for it!). I will cook for you........but I never volunteer to wash the dishes unless necessary.

So, gulp, yep, I'm eating my words. Not only are my kids washing dishes......they are doing it at 3 and 4 years old. They do a great job, too! It is amazing....they actually fight over who gets to help wash dishes each night. It has become a kind of game. Whomever acts the best during dinner, gets to wash the dishes. I'm dumbfounded. They love to do it!

And now, after 20 years of hating getting my hands in that soapy, greasy water.....I love it too. I'm thankful that my kids love doing dishes so much. It makes that chore quite a bit more cheerful! Especially when Kaya says (everytime), "Mom, washing dishes with you is my favorite part of the day." And last night Zander said, "Mom, Kaya was right. This is really a lot of fun."

You both are right kids, it is a lot of fun. And spending time with the two of you when we wash dishes is my favorite part of the day too.

our little pumpkin pie

Every Halloween season the kids and I design and Matt carves (thanks Matt!). But this season, Kaya was really in on the action. She kept eyeing the top of the pumpkin and kept saying, "Can I wear this for a hat?" We said , "No your hair will get gross and sticky."

She is such a good listener.

Peter, Peter, Pumpkin Eater

Had a Daughter and couldn't keep her.

Put her in a pumpkin shell,

And there we kept her very well.