even, steven?

As much as I love my husband, it always drives me crazy when he tries to negotiate his way. Any time I ask him to help me do something, I'll hear something like, "Well, if you do this.....I'll do that." This makes me want to scream at him, "Do you really want to make things Even Steven around here?" Why certainly....I will gladly sit on the couch and watch football while you cook dinner and clean all of the dishes. And by the way, don't forget the laundry!

So, I'm on this kick because last night I asked him to get up with me and the kids this morning so I could do some Christmas shopping early & then spend the rest of the day with them. His response was "Well what about Sunday?". To be honest, I was already planning on getting up early Sunday too....because I have so much I want to get done. But that comment left me fuming.....does he really think his sacrifice of not sleeping in one day measures up to my sacrifices I make daily?

After some sleep I woke up not as mad (sleep usually mellows my mood out) but looking at this from another perspective.

No, things will never be "Even, Steven" around here.............

I'm the one who gets to see my kids every morning when they wake up and want to hug each other, because they have missed one another for that long 13 hours of sleep.

I'm the one who will always have the memories of giving birth and nursing my babies when no one else could give them comfort.

I'm the one who does do all the shopping and cooking, but I'm also the one who goes with the kids to the grocery each week and see who very excited they are to drive the green car cart together.


I'll never understand Matt's love of sports, cars, and all of those other "manly" things that I often find ridiculous. He'll never understand the bond between a mother & daughter, the thrill of putting on new red lipstick, or how reading a book while taking a bath is my ideal of heaven.

I'm all for equality for men & women but some things will never be even. I guess we are so different so we can learn from each other and have some excitement from each other by not being exactly the same.

So next time Matt starts his questions of negotiation I won't snap back, but instead will think too myself....."it will never be Even Steven"....and then I'll let us share our experiences as parents & spouses together and store our separate memories in our memory banks of our very different brains.