Last night after I ate I was trying to decide if I should clean the kitchen (AGAIN), fold the laundry, or organize my receipts. Suddenly I felt a tugging to go color. It was like my 8th grade self got in my brain and said, "Go color and journal!"
So I did......
I have coloring book that I've owned for a few years that is called Color of a Woman. It was designed to journal in and guide you on a personal soulful journey but I'd only previously enjoyed coloring in it. Last night, I started coloring a page of a woman starting on a journey........it said, "Watch out World, Becoming a Bigger and Better Me." As I was coloring, I immediately started writing down my thoughts on the adjoining page about how to be a better me. As I wrote, I felt that 8th grade Korisa emerging again.
You're wondering, "What does she mean by 8th grade Korisa?" I remember in that time in my life I really thought there was nothing wrong with me. I thought I was beautiful, smart, and I would go on to accomplish so many great things. I would write in my journal daily about my hopes and dreams. I was so determined to succeed and live up to my full potential.
Lately, I have felt stuck. Aren't I destined to be more than the maid of my household? I want to stay at home to nurture my children ( and now I realize that means nurturing myself, too). Instead of nurturing them I often feel like a babysitter on a deadline to get the house spotless by the time my husband gets home........which is never accomplished, so then I feel like a failure.
But now I want to be 8th grade Korisa again.......there is more, and I remembered that about myself last night as I colored, journaled, and reflected. I set goals for myself to get back to me again. I really miss that girl!
After I was so deep and thoughtful I then just wanted to color a blank page full of stripes. That was my happy way to think of my friend who loves stripes more than anyone I know. You know who you are!!! I'm so glad I colored that page, every time I look at it I want to laugh as hard as I do when we are together!!!
I look forward to more coloring, journaling, reflecting. My way to get back to me and think of all the things & people I love!!!